My kids are going on a field trip today. I need extra kisses on those days because I am a worrier by nature. This morning Violet went into her classroom before I got a proper goodbye. Her teacher is fierce with me but in the kindest of ways; I am not allowed in her room unless invited and I totally respect her rules and her reasons for them. She makes me smile and boy does she adore my girl. I realized I had V’s backpack slung around my shoulder as I was about to leave and saw my chance to get my kiss. I showed it to the teacher who was still in the hall. “You can put it in her cubby. You can go now.” but I couldn’t. I lingered and hoped Violet would come back outside to gather her homework but she didn’t. Finally I left using the door next to her class hoping for a glimpse and her teacher caught me on it. “You are sneaky but you have to leave. She’s settled in and doing fine.” I stuck my tongue out at her. She said “Don’t you stick your tongue out at me!”, smiling. I apologized and said something about now she has an idea why Violet is who she is. “The first step is recognizing it” she said, “and the second is doing something to change.” Indeed. I love her because she sees my daughter and, apparently, she can see straight through me.
On the first day of middle school I watched Noah go in the cafeteria door with the rest of the kids. I lingered and then realized I was looking at a closed door. Then I moved on to the cafeteria window where I struggled for several minutes to see him. My effort was for naught because there were these metal screens on the windows and all I could see was shadowy movements. Finally, I told myself to move on. I’d done my research. I also remembered the school had my phone #. At the end if the day when I picked him up, the wonderful home room teacher walked out with him and said that they had a beautiful day. It is a powerful and liberating thing to trust the people you are leaving your child with. It sounds like you are having that experience too with this teacher.